I Was the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from Kindergarten Cop: A Candid Conversation.

The action icon is universally recognized as an Hollywood heavyweight. However, at the height of his cinematic dominance in the eighties and nineties, he also starred in several genuinely hilarious comedies. Chief among them is Kindergarten Cop, which celebrates its 35-year mark this December.

The Story and That Line

In the classic film, Schwarzenegger portrays a undercover cop who poses as a schoolteacher to track down a criminal. Throughout the movie, the procedural element acts as a basic structure for the star to have charming scenes with children. The most unforgettable belongs to a child named Joseph, who spontaneously announces and declares the former bodybuilder, “Boys have a penis, girls have a vagina.” Arnold replies icily, “I appreciate the insight.”

The boy behind the line was played by child star Miko Hughes. His career featured a notable part on Full House playing the antagonist to the child stars and the haunting part of the youngster who comes back in the screen translation of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. Hughes remains active today, with a slate of movies on the horizon. Additionally, he frequently attends popular culture events. He recently recalled his memories from the production over three decades on.

A Young Actor's Perspective

Q: To begin, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: I think I was four. I was the most junior of all the kids on set.

That's remarkable, I can't remember being four. Do you have any memories from that time?

Yeah, to a degree. They're flashes. They're like mental photographs.

Do you recall how you landed the job in Kindergarten Cop?

My family, especially my mother would take me to auditions. Often it was an open call. There'd be 20, 30 kids and we'd all just have to wait, go into the room, be in there for a very short time, do whatever little line they wanted and that's all. My parents would help me learn the words and then, when I became literate, that was probably the first stuff I was reading.

Do you have a specific memory of meeting Arnold? What was your take on him?

He was very kind. He was playful. He was good-natured, which arguably makes sense. It'd be weird if he was a dick to all the kids in the classroom, that probably wouldn't make for a positive atmosphere. He was fun to be around.

“It'd be weird if he was unpleasant to all the kids in the classroom.”

I was aware he was a major movie star because that's what my parents told me, but I had never really seen his movies. I sensed the excitement — it was exciting — but he didn't frighten me. He was just fun and I just wanted to play with him when he wasn't busy. He was working hard, but he'd kind of play with us here and there, and we would dangle from his limbs. He'd show his strength and we'd be dangling there. He was exceptionally kind. He purchased for each child in the classroom a Sony Walkman, which at the time was the hottest tech. It was the coolest device, that distinctive classic yellow cassette player. I used to rock out to the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for ages on that thing. It eventually broke. I also was given a authentic coach's whistle. He had the referee's whistle, and the kids all received one too as well.

Do you remember your experience as being enjoyable?

You know, it's interesting, that movie was this cultural thing. It was such a big movie, and it was an incredible opportunity, and you would think, in retrospect, I would want my memories to be of collaborating with Schwarzenegger, the legendary director, traveling to Oregon, being on a professional set, but my memories are of being a selective diner at lunch. Like, they got everyone pizza, but I didn't even like pizza. All I would eat was the toppings only. Then, the Nintendo Game Boy was new. That was the big craze, and I was proficient. I was the smallest kid and some of the older kids would hand me their devices to beat difficult stages on games because I knew how, and I was really proud of that. So, it's all little kid memories.

The Infamous Moment

OK, the penis and vagina line, do you remember how it happened? Did you know what you were saying?

At the time, I probably didn't know what the word taboo meant, but I knew it was provocative and it got a big laugh. I knew it was kind of something I wasn't supposed to do, but I was given an exception in this case because it was humorous.

“It was a difficult decision for her.”

How it came about, according to family lore, was they didn't have specific roles. A few scenes were established early on, but once they had the whole cast on the set, it wasn't necessarily improv, but they refined it on set and, presumably it's either the director or producers came to my mom and said, "We're thinking. We want Miko to deliver this dialogue. Are you okay with this?" My mom paused. She said, "Let me think about it, let me sleep on it" and took a short while. She really wrestled with it. She said she wasn't sure, but she believed it will probably be one of the most memorable lines from the movie and her instinct was correct.